2 days ago
How I got into the best shape of my life at 45
On number four, they feel manageable. At number eight, I'm not so sure. By the twelfth lateral raise my lip twitches. I stop for a few seconds before going again. And again. Shoulders shaking, I drop my 10kg weights by the dog bowl, pick up the 15kgs next to the fridge and move to something more challenging still: deadlifts.
Welcome to my kitchen workout, the heavy weights version — doable for anyone with discipline, a little space among the dishes and 45 minutes to spare. More muscle guaranteed, side order of grunting certain.
I'm not new to resistance training in my kitchen. Last year I shared with readers a workout I had devised, finding it more practical than driving to a mansplaining gym. Drawing inspiration from exercise classes I'd attended and personal trainers I'd interviewed as a health journalist, my routine focused on lots of repetitions of lighter weights, which improved my muscle endurance and cardiovascular fitness.
This workout helped me to feel fitter at 45 than I have felt in my life. But I was also beginning to plateau. There were only so many times I could tweak my existing exercises or increase my reps to challenge myself. Like many women I know who have exercised for a long time, I needed a new approach. I needed to join the heavy weights gang.
The benefits of heavier weight training go far beyond stopping the loss of muscle that accelerates in midlife, which most of us are now aware of. It can also help to regulate blood sugar levels and increase bone mineral density, which typically declines with oestrogen levels in menopause. Lifting heavier weights is likely to be better for fat loss than lifting light weights because it helps you to build more muscle — and because muscle tissue burns more energy than fat, even at rest, the more we have, the less susceptible we are to midlife spread.
It has also been found to be particularly good for the brain. Research in 2023 found that lifting weights at 80 per cent of participants' 1RM (one rep max — the maximum weight you can lift) increased levels of the protein brain-derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF) whereas lifting weights at 60 per cent did not. BDNF aids neuroplasticity, the brain's ability to adapt and change.
• How to start weight training in midlife
The Los Angeles writer Casey Johnston's new book, A Physical Education, charts how powerlifting helped her to overcome years of unhealthy dieting and exercising. Although Johnson, 38, appeared to be super-fit — she ran half-marathons and did cardio several times a week — she argues that instead of focusing on getting a stronger body, her fitness routines were all based on burning calories 'to help reveal her muscles underneath'. She was always exhausted and preoccupied with what her body looked like, trying to tone rather than get strong. 'I was running more and more and eating less and less,' she has said — and was unaware that she was actually losing muscle in the process. Changing her workout to focus on lifting heavy weights transformed that. It was not about getting 'smaller' but about 'how you feel. It's about protecting yourself,' she says.
On Instagram the personal trainer Elizabeth Davies, 41, aka @thiswomanlifts, describes 'toning' as 'a made-up term arguably designed to prey on women who have been conditioned for decades to fear getting bigger'. She adds: 'We cannot tone a muscle. We cannot sculpt a muscle. We cannot blast fat around a muscle by exercising that muscle.' Muscle either increases in size, remains the same size or shrinks, she explains, and muscle is crucial for health, not aesthetics.
I've become inspired by the American influencer Alicia Erickson, the Midlife Maven, who is a lifelong fitness fanatic like me but until recently of entirely average build. By 45 her regular running and CrossFit regime had started to feel taxing on her body. At 49 she started weight training instead and now boasts biceps of steel and abs you could crack a walnut on, with the emphasis very much on heavy weights. 'Booties' are not built with light dumbbells, she recently said, her confidence exuding from every pore.
The fitness trainer Jack Hanrahan has noticed a rise in women swapping multiple sets of lighter dumbbells for heavy weightlifting. 'Once you've mastered your form with lighter weights, going heavier is the sensible thing to do,' he says. 'You're not going to become stronger if you're not challenging your muscles.' And, he adds, 'heavy lifting changes the way my clients carry themselves. When you feel really strong, you feel more capable. It gives you more courage.'
Before I switched up my routine I wanted to know if it was safe to lift heavier weights in my kitchen, still not having the time or inclination to queue for complicated equipment in a weights room.
'Absolutely,' says the personal trainer Kate Rowe-Ham, who teaches midlife women to do just that via online classes on her app, Owning Your Menopause. 'For some women it's less intimidating lifting heavy weights at home than a gym because there's no one to see you pull a funny face.' On Rowe-Ham's recommendation I bought heavier dumbbells — 10kg (£56), 12.5kg (£68) and 15kg (£80) — from Factory Weights. An investment, obviously, but still cheaper than a gym membership. I also use a 6kg medicine ball.
According to Hanrahan, some people worry that going heavier means a mandatory gym membership to avoid injury. But he says that if you are lifting slowly and carefully, you should be OK to do a heavy home workout. 'You can handle heavier weights if you're doing fewer reps because you're under tension for less time,' he says. 'If you can do the number of reps without failing, you're strong enough. There's no risk.'
What is important is correct form, he stresses. Swaying or swinging during a movement increases the risk of injury, as does pushing to the point of failure 'because your form degrades and that means you're probably transferring some force into the joints', he says.
Breathing correctly is also key. When muscles are 'being lengthened and loaded and you need stability' — straightening your arm for a biceps curl or lowering for a squat, for example — breathe in through your nose because 'it has a better connection to the diaphragm', Hanrahan explains. 'You're more likely to breathe deeper, which activates the core muscles and stabilises the spine.'
There are 20 exercises in my new workout — 13 with heavier weights, along with seven conditioning exercises: jump squats, stomach crunches, oblique taps, lower abdominal raises, press-ups, triceps dips and a plank and side-plank.
I can still do it in my small kitchen. Lifting heavier I do fewer repetitions of most exercises. For example, I do three sets of ten shoulder presses rather than 50 in one go. I still do 'pulses' — smaller movements while in, say, a squat — to increase the time my muscles spend under tension. I allow five slow breaths, or about 30 seconds, between each set.
I've also added deadlifts to place more emphasis on my glutes, hamstrings and lower back, as well as weighted hip thrusts, which also work these muscle groups. 'We spend so long sitting down with these muscles inactive that it's important to train our posterior chain,' Rowe-Ham says. I have added bent-over lateral rows to build my upper back muscles, triceps kickbacks for the backs of my arms and weighted core exercises. For my squats I have added 3.5kg weights I found in the garage to my 20kg barbell, meaning I'm squatting 23.5kg.
Significantly I have sacrificed a spinning session to lift weights every other day (I used to do it every three days), setting my alarm for 5.30am. That's painful but by the end of my session my heart pounds and I'm elated.
What I have really noticed is how I seem to burn through food now. I mostly eat healthily but I eat a lot, and a chocolate or chips blowout doesn't seem to have an impact on the scales. I now weigh 6lb less than last summer and look a lot more muscly (according to my 14-year-old daughter). I have more energy but most importantly I feel stronger, more resilient. Cramming my weights back under the shoe rack at the end of a workout I feel as if I can take on the world.
The heavy weight exercises that have transformed my fitness
Barbell squats
Three sets of 40 reps with a 23.5kg weight
Use weights that allow you to lift the barbell comfortably over your head and rest it on the fleshiest part of your trapezius (upper back muscles). Hold the bar with both hands so your elbows are in line with your torso. With your feet slightly wider than shoulder-width apart, toes pointing out, buttocks pushed back and back straight, lower as far as you can while keeping your back straight. Push up. I do 20 of these, then 20 pulses in each set.
Rows
ANDREW FOX FOR THE TIMES
Two sets of 15 with a 12.5kg dumbbell
Keeping your left arm straight, place your left palm and left knee on a chair or coffee table. Holding a heavy weight in your right hand, keep your right arm straight, perpendicular to the floor, and your right leg straight with your right foot on the floor. Bend forward. Keeping your back straight and your elbow close to your body, pull the weight towards your torso, squeezing your shoulder blade. Lower. Repeat on the opposite side.
Biceps curls
Three sets of 12 reps with two 12.5kg dumbbells
Stand with feet hip-width apart, back straight and shoulders down. Have a heavy weight in each hand with your arms by the side of your body, palms facing forward. Bend both elbows at the same time to curl your weights up to your shoulders, and lower.
Weighted lunges
50 reps with two 12.5kg dumbbells, leading on right foot, then 50 leading on left
Stand with feet pointing forward, hip-width apart, with arms by your sides and a heavy weight in each hand. Step forward with your right foot so both legs are bent at a 90-degree angle and your front thigh is parallel to the floor. Squeeze your buttocks as you return to the starting position. I repeat this 30 times, then do 20 pulses.
• How to strengthen and tone your legs for summer
Weighted calf raises
ANDREW FOX FOR THE TIMES
35 reps with two 12.5kg dumbbells
Stand with feet shoulder-width apart, arms by your sides, holding heavy weights. Rise onto the balls of your feet. Lower.
Lateral raises
ANDREW FOX FOR THE TIMES
Three sets of 12, 10 and 10 reps with two 10kg dumbbells
Stand with feet shoulder-width apart, holding a heavy weight in each hand by your sides, palms facing inwards. Keeping your shoulders down and back straight, raise your arms to the sides until they're parallel to the floor. The straighter your arms, the harder the exercise. Rest between each set (I use 10kg weights, up from 8kg, when I did 25 continuous reps).
Deadlifts
Three sets of 15, 12 and 12 reps using two 15kg dumbbells
Standing feet hip-width apart, push your hips back and bend your knees slightly to grasp a barbell or two dumbbells at your feet, palms over the bar. Don't let your knees extend over your toes. Return to standing, weight in front of you, keeping your back straight, core engaged and head in line with your body.
Freestanding reverse fly
Two sets of 12 reps with two 10kg dumbbells
With feet hip-width apart, arms by your side and a weight in each hand, lean forward, keeping your core tight, back straight and knees slightly bent. Raise your arms to the side until level with your body and slowly lower.
Hip thrusts
ANDREW FOX FOR THE TIMES
Two sets of 25 with a 15kg dumbbell
Lie on your back, knees bent, hands lightly holding a heavy weight — I use 15kg — across your hips to stop it rolling off. Thrust your hips up towards your head, keeping your back straight and squeezing your glutes at the top. Lower your body so your upper back and bottom reach the floor together.
• How to get good glutes: seven easy exercises
Crunch with medicine ball
ANDREW FOX FOR THE TIMES
25 reps with a 6kg medicine ball
Lie on your back with your legs fully extended and your arms holding a medicine ball extended over your head. If you don't have a medicine ball, hold a weight. Raise your legs, torso and arms simultaneously until your legs and arms are perpendicular to the floor. Lower slowly.
Russian twists
ANDREW FOX FOR THE TIMES
20 reps with a 12.5kg dumbbell
Lie on your back with your knees bent and feet raised 10cm off the floor. Lift your torso until it creates a V shape with your thighs, and hold either end of a dumbbell (I use 12.5kg) so it is horizontal and close to your stomach. Twist your torso to the right as far as you can, return to centre. Twist to the left, return to centre. This is one rep.
Shoulder presses
ANDREW FOX FOR THE TIMES
Three sets of 10 reps with two 10kg dumbbells
Stand with feet shoulder-width apart, a weight in each hand. With palms facing forward, shoulders down, back straight and elbows under your wrists, hold the weights at your shoulders. Push the weight up until your arms are straight. Lower.
Triceps kickbacks
One set of 15 reps with a 12.5kg dumbbell
Stand with one leg in front, the other back, so you are leaning forward slightly with one arm on a chair or coffee table for support. Hold a weight (I use 12.5kg) in the opposite hand. Bend your elbow at a 90-degree angle, keeping your upper arm parallel to the floor. Squeezing your triceps, extend your arm backwards until it is straight. Return to starting position. Repeat on the other side.
